ssh/tailssh: make the SSH server a singleton, register with LocalBackend

Remove the weird netstack -> tailssh dependency and instead have tailssh
register itself with ipnlocal when linked.

This makes tailssh.server a singleton, so we can have a global map of
all sessions.

Updates #3802

Change-Id: Iad5caec3a26a33011796878ab66b8e7b49339f29
Signed-off-by: Brad Fitzpatrick <bradfitz@tailscale.com>
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